Don't waste your skin (neither your time and your money)! Don't use this Kanji-chart as a start point for a tattoo!!

Hello, everyone! In this post I want to warn you against a so-called "kanji chart" which, for the sake of the truth should be rather called "Laughably distorted Hanzi/Kanji chart". Below you can see the (in)famous chart:

At the first sight, the so-called chart and the accompanying text seem pretty credible, but don't let the appearances fool you: nearly all the ideograms presented in this image are distorted and several of them are wrongly translated.

So, if you want to get a Kanji/Hanzi tattoo, don't waste your time, don't waste your money, and, above all, don't waste your skin - and don't use this chart as inspiration for your future tattoo.

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Don't believe this guy - he has no idea what he's talking about:)
This is NOT a Kanji / Hanzi tattoo. This is just a doodle.
What possibly could be wrong with this tattoo?

When a Kanji/Hanzi tattoo spokes for itself

Recently, while I was looking for some stupid tattoos to make fun of them I've found this little gem:

First of all, the tattoo is pretty ugly, but this is just a little problem. The real problem is his meaning. The owner claims that this Hanzi means "friend" or "friendship" but it's real meaning is "disgraceful" or "ugly" (? - "friend, mate" and ? - "ugly" are homophones).

Do you see the irony here? This dude went to a tattoo parlor to get a nice Hanzi Tattoo and got instead a hideous tattoo which means ugly :)) At least, this poor tattoo is a honest one. And, besides, the real beauty comes from within :))

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Yes, it's correct. But it's weird.

Yes, it's correct. But it's weird.

Recently I've found this strange Kanji/Hanzi tattoo on tattooshunt.com:

Kanji/Hanzi tattoo which means bottle/vase???

I don't get it. This Kanji/Hanzi (which, by the way, is properly written) means jug/vase/jar/bottle - and so on... Unlike most ideograms, this one has no secondary meaning; it simply means recipient for liquids and nothing more. So, why would anyone get such a tattoo on his body?

Failed tattoos

"If you can't spell, you should think twice before get a text tattooed on your body!" I think that this piece of advice should be written at the entrance of every tattoo parlor. Obviously, there are plenty of those who don't care about this simple rule.

Because of the misspelled word "mayd" the meaning of this tattoo is a bit ambiguous: it's a king of love statements or this person claims that he / she used to work for the so-called "Maid for you" company?

He's Awsome. Not awesome, only awsome. I could't find this word in the dictionary so I suppose that Awsome is his name. Now, if you meet this dude and he tries to impress you by showing off his awesome tattoo you should say something like that: "Hello, Awsome! Nice to meet you!"

... and she means it: she chose a ridiculous misspelled tattoo instead of a regular, boring one.

This dude belive in himself. Too bad you didn't believe in your teachers, mate! I bet they can spell a lot better than you

"Beliefe" in dreams; too bad he / she doesn't believe in grammar.

This is deep philosophy, indeed. How about this one: misspellings make tattoos to look really stupid

Anyway, if you think that a misspelled tattoo is the most embarrassing kind of tattoo, you're wrong. To hire a Scratcher (an amateur or unskilled tattoo artist) is a is a much better way to get an embarrassing tattoo. Just look at the next five photos and you'll totally agree witth me:

Mummy's little adorable sweetest cutest creepy baby

Is something wrong with the artist who made the tattoo? Or maybe the tattoo is a very accurate image of the little girl's evil side.

Do you remember that old game "find 10 differences between two images. Here's an improved variant: find 100 differences between the photo and the tattoo. Or - even more difficult - try to find 3 similarities between the tattoo and the photo

Well, unlike the previous images, this time I don't have a photo to compare with the tattoo, so I cannot say if the tattoo artist a really unskilled one, or - even worse - poor Wendy looks just like that.

I suppose those lovely little children are Wendy's kids. If you're wondering who's Wendy look the image above :)

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Stupidity is painful

I've often heard that stupidity is painful - and recently I found the proof. For the beginning, let's keep in mind two facts about tattoos:

1. Getting a tattoo is a pretty painful process.
2. It's really silly to get a Kanji / Hanzi tattoo without getting informed about the Kanji / Hanzi 's meaning.

Now, with this two things in mind, let's take a look at this tattoo:

The very first problem is that the top character is upside down. But that is just a small problem.

The real problem is the meaning of these ideograms:

The the top character (?) means "pain; suffering; distress; anxiety; trouble".
The next two ideograms (??) mean "fool; simpleton; idiot".

The tattoo's meaning is something like "suffering idiot" or "a fool in pain" or "distressed simpleton" or something of this kind.

In conclusion, stupidity is really painful.

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Another failed kanji / hanzi tattoo

Yesterday I found this image on tattooingtattoodesigns dot com.

This tattoo can be found in the section called "asian tattoo design", but, if you ask me, it should be placed in a category called "Failed tattoos" or "misspelled tattoos", or something of this kind.

First, the translation of the ideograms is completely wrong: it's not "I am a goddess" (as the person who posted the photo thinks), it's just the word "goddess" awfully written.

The word ?? (pronunciations: nush�n in Chinese, joshin or megami in Japanese) is composed by these two ideograms:

This ideogram means "woman", "female"

This ideogram means "gods", "soul" or "mind". The ideogram is composed by two parts which MUST always be written together, not split in two, as the tattooer did in this case.

In the pictures below you can see the correct writing of this word:

the word "goddess" written with Chinese / Japanese ideograms - (vertical writing)

the word "goddess" written with Chinese / Japanese ideograms - (horizontal writing)

The tattoo so proudly displayed on that girl's neck is just an embarrassing misspelled tattoo, but fortunately, due to its small size and its simplicity, it can be easily covered with another tattoo.

Failed tattoos : misspelled tattoos 2

The first part of this post can be read here: Failed tattoos - misspelled tattoos 1. And now, let's see another series of failed tattoos:

You're right, dude, the pain is temporary (or tempary, like you've said), but your tattoo is not

"To young to die / to fast to live". How about this one: "too illiterate to get a tattoo" - how does it sound?

"Dance like noone is watching" - yeah, sure, dance like "noone" is watching and write like no one will ever read it

Who need a "guardian angel", anyway? A "gaurdian angel" is far more better than the old-fashioned "guardian angel"

"a coment?" I'll leave a comment right here: "comment" is written with two �m� 's, not one

Failed tattoos : misspelled tattoos 1

Unless you're getting a temporary tattoo, it's important to double check - even triple check - things like spelling and translations. These guys, apparently, didn't know this rule :)
Now, let's start the show:

This dude things he's "too cool for scool". Well, let's say he's too stupid for school:

This tough young fellow seems to know what he wants from life. Ok, dude, you've made your point: we'll let God to "Juge you" and we'll just laugh at you.

It's summser timme. It's timme to have somme fun... or maybe it's time to learn how to spell "summer": s-u-m-m-e-r - as you can see, it's not a difficult word.

This year, forget about Puerto Rico. Let's visit "Puerto Rirco", the new attraction of South America:

"Swet pee?" I can't argue with her, I've never tasted pee :)